Archive for October 31st, 2008

Kids Pick the Funniest Poems

October 31, 2008

kids-pick-the-funniest-poemsIf there’s a kid in your life who likes to laugh, Kids Pick the Funniest Poems will make a wonderful present. I wrote five poems for it (including the one below) but that’s not why I’m recommending it. I don’t get any royalties from sales. I just think it’s an awesome book that every kid should have.

Bruce Lansky of Meadowbrook Press combed through tons of poem books to collect what he thought were the cream of the crop. He then read the finalists to actual grade school classrooms and the kids voted on which poems they liked the most. Those are the ones that made it in the book.

One of the reasons the book turned out so well is that Stephen Carpenter illustrated every poem. He’s a wonderful artist and his work really brings the book alive. Coincidentally, I found out later that Stephen just happened to be the illustrator for a number of greeting cards I had sold earlier to Hallmark. Small world!

I’ve read some of the poems to grade school classes and kids absolutely love it. Lots of teachers keep the book in the classroom because it’s a class favorite. I’ve even received fan letters from kids all over the world, some of whom were doing book reports on me. Ha! It’s fun to respond back to them.

My daughter was twelve when I wrote the five poems that I contributed and we were in full goofball mode, so writing them was easy and fun! I hope you enjoy the book!


Illustration by Stephen Carpenter


I don’t understand why everyone stares
When I take off my clothes and dance down the stairs.
Or when I stick carrots in both of my ears,
Then dye my hair green and go shopping at Sears.
I just like to dress up and do goofy things.
If I were an angel, I’d tie-dye my wings!

Why can’t folks accept me the way that I am?
So what if I’m different and don’t act like them?
I’m not going to change and be someone I’m not.
I like who I am, and I’m all that I’ve got!

Illustration by Stephen Carpenter


The monsters in my closet
Like to sleep the day away.
So when I get home from school,
I let them out to play.

When Mom calls me for supper,
I give them each a broom.
First they put my toys away,
And then they clean my room.

The Mummy hates to vacuum.
So if he starts to whine,
I kick his rear and tell (more…)