Holding On to the Side of the Pool

Ten days before Christmas, my friend Jecenia was stopped on the freeway on her way to work, waiting behind a line of cars at an exit, when a careless driver plowed into her at full speed. For two months, she spent much of her time in bed, resting and recuperating. Many of her friends stopped by to visit, including Dave, who offered to give her an astrological reading. When Dave mentioned during the reading that she was living with a heart full of fear, she immediately knew he was right. So she challenged herself to use this down time to figure out why she had chosen to live in fear and how she could overcome it. As soon as she began exploring her inner terrain, one insight after another came tumbling out of her thoughts, and faster than you can say, “No more suffering,” she liberated herself from the prison of fear. Here’s are some of the thoughts she shared with me:

I realized that I had let fear be my king, and I bowed down to it. I wasn’t allowing myself to be me; I was letting fear completely own me. I’m a kind and loving person, why would I do that to myself? I had been living my life like I was holding on to the side of the pool, afraid to let go. But that didn’t make any sense. I had learned to swim long ago. Why wasn’t I making use of my new skills and enjoying what life had to offer?

I had been doing all the right things for the wrong reasons. I’d always be thinking ahead and imagining how I would handle every possible situation that might occur—if A happens, I’ll do this, if B happens, I’ll do that, and so on. On top of that, I always made sure I had a safety net. I was always on alert. I always had everything covered. I thought I was being smart. But living in fear of everything that could go wrong isn’t smart, it’s exhausting. Living in fear didn’t protect me, it only brought more fear into my life.

Then it hit me: When I was younger, fear had kept me safe and sane when I needed to protect myself and couldn’t. It was my training wheels. It was a survival mechanism. But I’m not in survival mode anymore. I’m ready to live. And just like that, I saw that I didn’t have to try to control every possible outcome in every possible situation. Instead, I surrendered to the intelligence that runs the universe, knowing that it was a lot wiser than I was. And you know what? I discovered that surrendering empowered me. It took the burden of running the universe off my shoulders. As soon as I surrendered, I woke up to my life.

Fear had been there to help me. It was there to keep me alive, to help me survive, but now I can say goodbye to it. It was here for a reason and now it’s gone for a reason. I feel like I’m finally free to live and it’s wonderful. I finally understand what the Buddha meant when he said, “When you realize how perfect everything is you will tilt your head back and laugh at the sky.”


Phil is the author of Through God’s Eyes: Finding Peace and Purpose in a Troubled World, a comprehensive guide to living a spiritual life. Who will benefit from reading it?

Anyone who is on a spiritual path, or wants to start one
Anyone who loves life, or wants to learn how to
Anyone who is happy, or wants to be happier

To order your copy of Through God’s Eyes, go to GodsEyesOrder.com OR order from Amazon at GodsEyesAmazon.com OR for an inscribed copy, click here to e-mail Phil for information.

Click here for more information about Through God’s Eyes.
Click here to ask Phil to add you to his e-mail list for updates on his blog and books.

Here is a two-minute video introduction to Through God’s Eyes.

Want to learn more about Through God’s Eyes? Here is a free 40-page PDF sampler from the book that includes:

• an overview of the book
• the complete table of contents
• the Foreword by Caroline Myss
• my Introduction
• chapter excerpts
• a sample end-of-chapter story
• endorsements from authors and thought leaders

Just click on the link below to download your free PDF sampler!

Schedule a Mastery Mentoring phone session with Phil to learn how to apply principles of spiritual living more effortlessly and effectively. Priced affordably! Click here to e-mail Phil for details.

SiSe_fullcover_final.inddPhil is also the author of Sixty Seconds: One Moment Changes Everything, a collection of 45 inspiring, life-changing stories from prominent people he interviewed, including Joan Borysenko, Deepak Chopra, geneticist Dr. Francis Collins, acclaimed sportswriter Frank Deford, Dr. Larry Dossey, Wayne Dyer, Dan Millman, Caroline Myss, Dr. Christiane Northrup, Dr. Dean Ornish, Dr. Rachel Naomi Remen, Dr. Bernie Siegel, James Van Praagh, singer Billy Vera, Doreen Virtue, Neale Donald Walsch, and bassist Victor Wooten.

Here is a three-minute video that introduces you to Phil and his book. Click here to order Sixty Seconds. Click here to ask Phil to add you to his e-mail list for updates on his blog and books.

Reading this book is like spending a few minutes face to face with each of the contributors and listening to their personal stories. Click here to read unsolicited testimonials from readers. Learn more by visiting the official Sixty Seconds website.

Sixty Seconds was one of three finalists in the General Interest/How-To category at the 12th annual Visionary Awards presented by COVR (Coalition of Visionary Resources) in Denver on June 27, 2009.

Tags: , , ,

2 Responses to “Holding On to the Side of the Pool”

  1. debreilly Says:

    “…I woke up to my life.” Beautiful, Jecenia! Thanks, Phil!

  2. Phil Bolsta Says:

    Beautiful indeed! Thank you, Deb!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: