Posts Tagged ‘failure’

The One Thing You Need to Know to Overcome Perfectionism

September 7, 2013
erin-dougherty

Erin Dougherty


This excellent post
by life coach Erin Dougherty cuts right to the heart of the compulsion to be perfect. I first gained insight into this subject by reading a wonderful and eye-opening book that explained the link between procrastination and perfectionism.

Here is the sentence in Erin’s essay that jumped out at me:

I never realized that perfectionism was an attempt to avoid all rejection, all criticism and all failure.

I’ve seen this fear control the lives of so many people I know and care about. Instead of making things happen and living a life of choice, they end up letting things happen and living a life of chance. The fear of criticism and failure is where dreams go to die. It makes me profoundly sad to know that decades from now, on their deathbed, so many people will experience the soul-crushing pain of regret at never having summoned the courage to follow their heart and chase after their dreams.

May Erin’s essay serve as a clarion call to procrastinators everywhere: Surrender to the indomitable spirit within you that ceaselessly whispers, You can do this . . . you must do this . . . there is greatness within you!



THE ONE THING YOU NEED TO KNOW TO OVERCOME PERFECTIONISM

by Erin Dougherty

“You’re imperfect and you’re wired for struggle but you are worthy of love and belonging.” ~Brene Brown

There’s nothing perfect about me and I’m ok with that…now. This wasn’t the case for most of my life, though. In fact, I’ve been a perfectionist for almost 30 years. I’m not counting the first five years of my life when I was free to be as messy and magical as I wanted.

In third grade I asked my mom to buy me a stack of lined notebooks and colored pens. I spent hours neatly labeling each notebook by class, date and assignment deadlines. If I made one mistake like a jagged cursive letter or a misspelling, I’d rip out the page and begin again on a fresh sheet.

This was tiring but it was also a compulsion. Everything had to be (more…)

We Are All Failures

July 26, 2011


Even the gravest of mistakes can be a blessing if you use it as a key to unlock inner storehouses of fortitude and resolve.


Failure is God’s own tool for carving some of the finest outlines in the character of his children.
Thomas Hodgkin

Behind every successful person is a trail of (more…)

Your Own Permission

October 15, 2010

If you are not living an abundant life, chances are that you do not feel worthy of abundance. You probably think you have committed too many mistakes, experienced too many failures and made too many poor choices to deserve God’s blessings. I can relate. Then, while walking along a tree-lined country road this morning, I realized there were three reasons why I needed to work through my resistance:

Self-worth comes from one thing—thinking that you are worthy.
Wayne Dyer

Personal (more…)

Don’t Kick Yourself—Ask Three Questions Instead

June 29, 2009

large-rose-colored-glasses-on-beachA friend recently confessed that he had resumed an addiction he thought he’d conquered years ago. In the not-too-distant past, I would have reacted judgmentally. Instead, my heart went out to him, imagining the shame and vulnerability he must be feeling.

In the last few years, I have been so humbled by life that judging others for such shortcomings has become unthinkable. I’m very happy with the life I’ve built and with who I am, yet there are areas of my life in which, from all objective standards, I have failed miserably.

True, I’ve (more…)