You Can Choose a Better Reality

At lunch today, a friend asserted some opinions about parenting and romantic relationships that, based upon his experiences and observations, he regarded as absolutes.

I disagreed, informing him that my experiences were the direct opposite of his. I essentially told him, “Your reality is not my reality. Therefore, it is not the only reality. Therefore, you can choose to live in a different, better reality.”

He didn’t budge. His beliefs had caused him great stress throughout his life and were responsible for many unnecessary roadblocks, but he remained convinced that the way he saw the world was the way it was, period.

The only reason the same thing keeps happening is that

The Doorway of Discontentment

Dan Millman

In his essay for Inspire Me Today, author Dan Millman shared a profound experience that continues to help him maintain his perspective during difficult times. It’s a beautiful lesson worth sharing.

Click here to read an excerpt from the  story Dan told me for my book, Sixty Seconds: One Moment Changes Everything.

YOUR DISCONTENT IS THE FIRST STEP TOWARD AWAKENING

In our day-to-day lives, most of our attention tends to focus on the realities of the conventional world: our relationships, perhaps raising children, going to school or work, addressing issues in the areas of health and finances.

At the same time, we each experience, from time to time or even persistently, that whispered voice of our heart or higher self, reminding us and calling us to look beyond the conventional world to a higher or transcendent reality.

Sometimes we experience a sudden wake-up call—a loss or change that forces us to consider what life is really about and what’s truly important. It shakes

If Days Were Jelly Beans . . .

Jelly beans as a metaphor for life? Yep. Even if you are avoiding refined sugar, feast on

Beyond the Body

Heidi von Beltz, a former championship skier and aspiring actor, was paralyzed from her earlobes down in a two-vehicle head-on collision while working as a stunt double in The Cannonball Run in 1980. Unbowed by her doctors’ prognosis that she had perhaps five years to live, von Beltz routinely endured a grueling regimen of physical therapy and muscle stimulation for up to ten hours a day. Nine years later, she was able to sit up on her own. Six years after that, outfitted with lightweight aluminum leg braces, she taught herself to stand.

Sixteen years after the crash, while promoting her memoir, My Soul Purpose, von Beltz, who had devoured countless books on philosophy and spirituality, said she considered herself lucky and wouldn’t have wanted to miss the experience of her paralysis for anything. “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been,” she told Entertainment Weekly magazine. ‘‘I was always so active that I would never have sat down long enough to learn what I’ve learned. I can’t imagine going through this life and not knowing what I know now. I just had to break my neck to do it.’’

The following paragraph from page 97 of von Beltz’s memoir illustrates the start of her transition from body identification to a higher awareness of self:

After the crash, talking with good friends or “losing myself” watching a movie, I forgot about my physical body. This was a new experience for me because I am such a physical, active person. Other people always had reinforced the importance of my body because, even when I was growing up, they reacted to my appearance: I’m a tall and

The Sweetness in Their Soul

If there is someone whom you regard with disdain or scorn, know that someone else views that same person in the opposite way. Yes, your counterpart may not know what you know or see what you see, but their perception is equally valid, for they choose to see the sweetness in your adversary’s soul rather than the negative qualities that you have so single-mindedly zeroed in on.

Remind yourself that it is also true that some people view you with great affection while others consider you an object

What a Gift! What a Miracle!

The next time you sit down with a loved one, challenge yourself to appreciate them like never before. Here’s how.

Imagine that earlier in the day you got the news that your loved one had passed away suddenly. If that had actually happened, you would have given all you owned to sit with them like you’re sitting with them right now—to hold

How Can I Not Be Grateful?

If you’re going through a tough time, some thoughts from my friend Melanie may offer some comfort and hope. During our e-mail conversation, Melanie revealed that she had never truly felt loved as a child but learned to be a loving and compassionate person in spite of her upbringing.

I wrote back:

I’m sorry you were not unconditionally loved by your parents. In my view, that is inexcusable. But I understand that many parents aren’t mature and healthy enough to do what should come naturally. Good for you for breaking the unhealthy cycle!

Melanie wrote back:

Yeah, my mom didn’t love me unconditionally and I grew up with my dad’s